


watching it burn

by teasockschocolate



Category: The Greatest Showman (2017)
Genre: F/M, Fire, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Minor Suicidal Thoughts, Minor Swearing, Whump, don't run into a fire kids, it's dangerous, reversed roles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 19:23:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14315499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teasockschocolate/pseuds/teasockschocolate
Summary: Based on a tumblr prompt for the fire scene but with Anne and Phillip's roles reversed___The fire roared in her ears and she winced at the pain of it all. Every instinct in her was screaming for her to get out. But she knew that she’d only been in here for seconds and Phillip had been in for god knows how long. If she was in this much pain already… the thought of how much Phillip must be in spurred her on.





	watching it burn

The night sky rained embers. Untamed flames danced as they climbed higher and higher up the skeleton of the building. Anne was numb as she helped Lettie stumble to the crowd of onlookers. They cried and reached out to them, everyone clinging to each other sobbing as they watched their home go up in smoke; for most of them the only true home they had ever known.

Anne couldn’t find it in her to cry or panic, only blindly go through motions of taking head counts of her family surrounding her. Her brother came up behind her, enveloping her in his arms, her back pressed to his chest. He was trembling, but he didn’t cry either.

The sea of people grew, swarming around the crumbling circus. There were shouts, but none that she registered; she was unable to do anything but watch.

She was passively aware of Barnum joining the crowd (where did he come from?) shouting and checking on everyone. She didn’t pay any real attention until she heard a panicked cry for her name.

“Anne!” She whipped her head, brow creasing. Barnum gripped a shoulder, his eyes reflecting the orange flames. “Where’s Phillip?”

They both realized exactly where he was at the same time. She hadn’t seen him since the bows at the end of the show, having been preferring to avoid him as much as she possibly could.

“Anne,” W.D.’s arms went to tighten around her but she twisted away. “No! Anne, come back!”

He lunged for her but she was gone, streaking away to the inferno. The numbness she felt was gone, replaced with a terror that consumed every ounce of her being.

 _It’s hot_ , was the first thing Anne stupidly registered. She could barely see what was in front of her. She called out his name, but it lodged in her throat and smoke found it’s way in instead. She pulled her shawl up to cover her face in an attempt to keep out some smoke; she wouldn’t do him any good if she collapsed in here.

The fire roared in her ears and she winced at the pain of it all. Every instinct in her was screaming for her to get out. But she knew that she’d only been in here for seconds and Phillip had been in for god knows how long. If she was in this much pain already… the thought of how much Phillip must be in spurred her on.

A beam shot down from the ceiling and barely missed her. Forced to redirect her path, she continued to blindly stumble through the fire, eyes wide and blinking back tears.

Something heavy struck her in the side of the face and she was knocked to the ground. It was her hoop, she realized foggily as a clatter of metal at her feet told her. She clutched her skirts closer to her as flames creeped in to lick them.

Her face was streaming with tears from the heat and overwhelmingness of it all, her lungs were screaming in agony. After a few feeble attempts to push herself off the ground, she decided there was no use. If she’d been knocked down so early, there was no way Phillip was still alive. There was no way she could get up, and even if she could she didn’t want to face what her world would be like. Without the circus. Without him.

Anne should have realized he was missing sooner. Maybe she would’ve been able to get to him before the fire got too out of control. She should have found him first when she stopped on her way out to help the others. She should have been the one left behind, not him. She was the one who deserved to be here.

All Phillip had done was love her. And all she had done was shut him down, cause him pain, force him back to the bottle of whiskey he hadn’t touched in months.

She deserved to die.

Just as she was letting her eyelids droop, something happened. Something — was it a person? — hoisted her off the ground into it’s arms.

“C’mon, Anne,” The voice was raspy and sputtering. It sounded vaguely like Phillip, but it couldn’t be. He was dead; burned to a crisp lon before her.

Arms were wrapped around her tightly and her head spun, dizzy from lack of oxygen. Maybe this is what dying was like.

“Anne!” She knew that was her brother’s voice which left her more confused than before. W.D. had been safe outside.

The smoke was starting to wrap itself tighter around her lungs, making it nearly impossible to breath. Anne was being carried now, though whoever had her kept tripping they kept her tightly pressed to their chest. She gasped for oxygen and desperately tried to widen her eyes to see, but the smoke and heat stung. Unable to fight it, she let her head fall back and the world went dark.

* * *

W.D. surged forward to follow her, but Constantine and Barnum both grabbed a hold of him to pull him back.

“There he is!” Helen flung an arm out to the man weaving his way out of the crowd. She and her sister raced towards him, throwing their arms around his middle.

“Where’s Anne?” Lettie peered behind him, as if expecting her to emerge out of the smoke.

Phillip frowned. “What?”

“She went in. We thought you were still…” Lettie trailed off, her eyes widening as she realized what was happening.

“ _What?_ ” Phillip’s hands on the top of the Barnum girls’ heads went still.

“Oh no,” Charity’s hand rose to her head. “Phillip, no…”

“What’s happening?” Caroline pulled back to look at her mother.

“Phillip!” Helen screamed when he broke away from the girls and sprinted to the fire.

Constantine and Barnum weakened their grasp on W.D., stunned; he used this to easily tear away and follow Phillip into the inferno.

“Anne!” Phillip skidded to a halt in the doorway, frantically trying to see her through the flames.

A clang of metal followed by a weak yelp came from somewhere and he tore after it, praying he was going in the right direction.

Through the haze of smoke he was able to make her out just as she collapsed.

“Anne!” He scrambled to her, falling into a crouch trying gingerly to not touch the embers beneath them.

She was oblivious to what was happening, nothing but a feeble wheeze answering him as he shook her.

“C’mon, Anne,” He grunted, looping his arms under hers to pull her to her feet. She was still in a daze, falling limply against him. As quickly as he could without hurting her more, he bent to sling her legs under an arm; despite the inch or two she had on him, he was able to lift her surprisingly easily.

“Anne!” Phillip whipped around to see her brother fighting his way towards them. “You got her?”

Phillip nodded mutely and nearly tripped over his own feet as they tried to run. The building was beginning to come down around them in black, flaming beams. Phillip pulled Anne as close to him as he possible could, desperately trying to shield her best he could. He could feel the flames beginning to lick at him, feel the smoke threatening to suffocate him, but the only thing he could really register was that he had to get Anne out.W.D. hovered next to him, warning him of smoldering obstacles on the smoke covered ground.

The air that greeted him when they got out was wonderfully cold and made his lungs clench as he wheezed. He kept at a steady pace, getting as far away from the building as he could before he collapsed to his knees. W.D. had to nearly pry Anne from his grasp, turning her over to place two fingers to her neck.

“She’s still breathing. Just got a lot of smoke.” Her brother’s voice was thick with emotion, fully realizing just how close he had come to losing her.

Barnum put a hand on Phillip’s shoulder as medics with a gurney swarmed over, lifting Anne onto it and loading her into the carriage.

“I wanna go with her,” Phillip staggered to his feet, though his chest screamed in protest.

“Shhh,” Barnum laid another hand on his shoulder, gently pushing him back to the ground. “Stay down, son.”

“But—“

“You’ll go soon.”

Phillip’s stomach rolled and his eyes started to droop. “Ow,” He mumbled.

The last thing he heard was Barnum calling for another doctor before he felt himself hit the pavement.

 

* * *

 

Anne’s eyes were crusted with sleep and soot as she struggled to peel them open, groaning a little. The light that met her was blindingly bright and she vaguely wondered if she was dead.

Then a shooting pain fired through her entire body and she knew she was still on Earth.

Her brother’s anxious face swam into view above her. “Hey, Annie,”

“Dee,” She mumbled, blinking several times.

“You scared us all,” W.D. rubbed the pad of his thumb across her cheekbone.

“Wh- what happened?”

“Well, you ran into a fire, genius.” He cracked a smile. “And now you’re in the hospital.”

“Ph-Phillip,” She remembered with a jolt and tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. “I couldn’t find him. I tried but I—“

“Shh, it’s okay. He was already out when you went in.”

Anne frowned. “How’d I get out?”

The corner of W.D.’s mouth raised into a crooked smile. “He went in after you. I did too, right behind him.”

Anne’s eyes widened. “Are you okay? Where’s he?”

“I’m fine. He got the worst of it, carrying you out of there with everything coming down around us.”

“Is he—“

“He’s okay. He had to stay overnight here but he’s fine now.”

“Overnight?”

W.D.’s smile dropped a little. “Annie, you’ve been out for three days now. Been giving us quite a scare.”

“Oh.”

“Do you feel okay?”

Anne bit her lip. “I think so…”

“Do you want me to get Phillip?”

Her eyes shot up to his and she hoped she didn’t look as desperately eager as she felt. Her brother’s chuckle made her think maybe not. “Where is he?”

Her brother smirked and gestured his chin to the opposite side of the bed. “He fell asleep a few hours ago.”

She turned her head, feeling her heart swell as she saw Phillip a few feet away in a chair, head propped against the wall and mouth slightly agape.

“Phillip,” W.D. called. “Phillip, wake up.” With a huff, he leaned across Anne and lightly slapped Phillip’s knee. “Phillip!”

“Wha—“ Phillip jolted awake with a start, looking around wildly. When his eyes landed on Anne, a smile instantly sprang to his face that was so incredibly dopey she couldn’t help smiling back.

“I’m gonna tell the others you’re up.” W.D. kissed the top of Anne’s head and left the wing, throwing a look she couldn’t exactly read over his shoulder.

She turned back to Phillip, suddenly feeling oddly nervous.

“How are you?” Phillip tentatively shifted closer to her. “How do you feel?”

“Like I just ran through a fire.”

“I’m so sorry, Anne,” Phillip slid off his chair onto his knees in front of her.

She frowned. “For what?”

“I heard…Well, they said that you went in…”

“For you?” Anne finished quietly. “I did.”

“Why?” His eyes — still the bluest ones she’s ever seen — were flooded with guilt and uncertainty, but a tiny spark of hope danced in the back of them.

“Same reason you went back after me.”

Phillip blinked. “You remember that?”

“W.D. told me.”

“Ah,”

“I thought…” Her voice broke. It was stupid, but the terror that she’d felt when she’d been convinced he was burning still was as fresh as it had been that night. “I thought you were gone.”

“I’m not.” He shifted closer on his knees, bravely extending a hand to lightly brush her cheek. “I’m right here.”

“You’re here.” She repeated quietly, still reminding herself.

He was here. He was safe. He wasn’t dead and she hadn’t failed him. But she’d come close to losing Phillip Carlyle once and she’d be damned if she ever let him spend another second without knowing that the fear of him burning was stronger than any fear of what people may say about them. So she reached a hand, still gingerly from the pain, and grasped the front of his shirt, gently leading him down to her. The spark of hope in his eyes ignited into an untamed flame of joy when she pulled his lips to hers.

Kissing Phillip Carlyle was a vibrant collision of stars behind her eyelids and warmth spread from her hair (which he eagerly threaded his fingers through as he deepened the kiss) to the very tips of her toes. She let a hand, which she noted was bandaged, come up to the base of his neck and wondered how she could possible have waited _so damn long_ to do this; why she had intentionally deprived herself of his.

He pulled back (after what could have been seconds or hours) just enough to study her face; she immediately missed the lack of contact and wanted to pull him right back. “Anne…” His brows furrowed a little. “Are you… If this is just…because we both almost died or a thank you… I can’t. It’s not fair.”

“It’s not.” Anne whispered, rubbing her index and middle finger on his palm. “When I thought you were in there… I realized… nothing could be more awful than you being gone. And… I was so scared then, how I felt before is nothing.”

Phillip didn’t respond, just took a shaky breath. His eyes roamed over her face as if he was trying to make sure she was telling the truth.

“I’m not scared to love you anymore.”

His breath audibly hitched again and she bit her tongue to not laugh or coo at the adorable, unadulterated grin he gave her. He surged down to kiss her, murmuring her name against her lips.

“I love you so much.” His voice was shaking and threatened to break.

“I love you.” She pressed her forehead to his, relishing in that she could touch him now. She could finally give up on the exhausting endeavor of guarding herself from him that she’d been working so hard on for months.

He’d been so unbelievably good; respecting the distance she put between him, being incredibly patient the entire time she’d held him at arms length. God, he ran into a full fledged fire after her when she hadn’t even spared him a glance for weeks.

“I love you,” She repeated, not kissing him, but linking her arms and burying her face in the crook of his neck. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“Anne, you don’t have to be sorry for anything. I followed you. I wasn’t even in there, if anything it’s my fault.”

Anne shook her head, tears brewing. “I shouldn’t have pushed you away so much. I’ve just been hurting you for months.”

“You’ve been hurting yourself too.” Phillip pressed a swift kiss to her cheek. “But you can let yourself be happy now. I’ll do anything to make you happy, Anne.”

“I don’t deserve you,” She murmured.

“It’s the other way around.” Anne could hear the smile in Phillip’s voice. He nuzzled his nose against her temple. “You are… everything.”

“I love you,”

“So you’ve said,” Phillip laughed. “I love you too.”

“I’ve wished I could say it for months, so now I gotta make up for it.” Anne pulled back, the hint of a tease in her smile when she kissed him again.

“Fine by me.”

She still believed that she did not deserve Phillip Carlyle; but for the rest of her life she was going to spend every second trying to.

 


End file.
